Oh my . . . It happened . . .here I am

So it finally happened. I was totally unprepared, not to mentioned caught off guard!


Jerry, my pastor called this afternoon asking if I would help him with the service tommorow. Of course, I would! So tommorrow I am lighting the Christ Candle for ALL the victims of war (active duty personell and their families included), reading the scripture, and accepting the offering at the pulpit. I told him I'd be glad to help, just because I am glad to help, but also because I need the worship practice! Then we got to talking about how I may be able to participate more in the worship services as I prepare to move toward field education as part of my seminary training next Fall.


That is when he said it. "Maybe you ought to think about preaching." Huh? Ok. I know I should. But as I told Jerry, I'm a little scared of that, I just don't feel ready. The truth is I feel like a bit of a hermit right now. I feel myself changing in good ways. I feel as if my spirituality is developing. This is all good. I am just feeling very shy, and perhaps a little insecure about my new self. Its Adolence of the soul, so I feel awkward--very awkward. I told Jerry that I knew I should start preaching but that I was scared. So Jerry told me to think about it because there would be a friendly audience for me preach to at our church, and I might want to do this before I start at another church. As always, Jerry is absolutely right. So I told him I'd think about it. . . .O.k. I told him summer might be a better time as school keeps me so busy . . . but I know he is right, maybe I should not put it off that long.


Oddly enough I think I already now the scripture to use. It came to mind as soon as Jerry mentioned having me preach. So wow, I am thinking.


Oh, my what now . . . where is my shell? Where is my strength? I am not used to feeling so shy and reclusive. See that picture on my page?--I should be used to getting up and speaking truth I've been doing it for years, but as a poet, not a preacher. Perhaps the monastic life of religious hermitage is not for me after all--I all ready knew this--its just that now I have been called out!


Here I am LORD!