Time

So my world has changed quite dramatically since last I posted in this blog.

I am now a seminary student at the Claremont School of Theology. the schedule is demanding, but I am loving it. My biggest struggle is time. So much to do and the time speeds by.

The struggle of the semester is balance. Trying to "satisfiy and harmonize" all the various elements of my life so that "nothing is out of proportion or unduly emphasized", to qutoe the MS Word dictonary. Each week I am trying a new study schedule.

It has been hard to balance the demands of academia and family and social life. Painfully I have allowed my family life to suffer. It causes me pain because it disappoints those I love. While that is not my goal I admit that I have become apathetic in allowing it to happen; it seems natural to me because I come from a long line of workaholics, they do this and it is all I know. What I have never encountered before is the idea that it could actually bother anyone. So I am now faced with a situation I have never even dreamed on encountering. This is a "growing edge" for me as I know it is something that I can't and don't want to maintain (Gerald May). Yes, I want the cycle to stop with me. Here I am in the "times that are a' changin'" (Bob Dylan).

I am struggling with time. This week I have until 5pm on Tuesday to finish all that I will do before leaving for school on Wednesday, so that I can have a "family night".